Pre-Marital, Marital, and Divorce Consulting
Don’t Allow Lawyers to Profit off Your Family and Your Children!
Giving Peace of Mind
My clients save, on average, $10,000 by talking to me first.
Marriage is one of the biggest legal and financial commitments most people ever make in their lifetimes. Intelligent people would never enter into even a $5000 investment, without legal or business counseling, and no one should enter into a far more expensive contract without it either.
Whether you are thinking about getting married or considering separation or divorce, it is vital that you talk to someone to make sure you and your family’s needs are accounted for and well represented.
Thinking of Getting Married?
Make no mistake, I am pro-family and pro-marriage, but that does not mean anyone should go into it blindly. Let me work with you to understand your feelings and warn you of the potential pitfalls. 1 hour can save you years of heartache and loads of money!
Thinking of Getting Divorced?
I know that you have been thinking a lot! Having someone to talk to, who is unbiased and honest, can help you to make a well-informed decision that fits your family and lifestyle before you make any long-term or irrational decisions. Even if you are merely considering a separation you should know what is ahead before you make any moves.
Confidentiality
Everything that you discuss with me stays 100% confidential, and protected by a confidentiality agreement we will all sign. I am not a “mandated reporter”. (like most therapists) We can go over all possible options without the extreme attorney costs, yet with the same, if not more, privacy.
I will...
- Show you how to protect your children from impersonal decision-makers like judges and court-appointed child attorneys who will likely force you into a schedule or arrangement that isn’t fair and/or doesn’t work for your family.
- Lessen the anger and hurt between the parties.
- Too often attorneys make matters worse between parents/spouses leaving years of anger and resentment in their wake. By clearly explaining what you are entitled to and what is and is not worth fighting for. I can guide you in a way where you can still get what you want/need while saving you pain and money.
- Dispel rumors about divorce and the legal system. We have all heard horror stories from our friends and neighbors. Some are true, some are not. No 2 divorces are the same, and what one person experienced might not be the same as what you are facing.
- You might expect the court to be consistent, but it is not. Every court date is a risk that could change your life forever. Let me show you the traps and how you can hopefully avoid them.
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Divorces Go to Settlement
Why pay 3 attorneys (yours, theirs, and children’s) to get the same outcome as mediation? While attorneys and judges love to threaten long and expensive trials, the reality is that only 7% will actually see one.
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Guarantee
Most of my clients save, on average, $10,000 by choosing my services over litigation.
I am so certain of this, that if you don’t learn something new and helpful in your very first session, I will refund you the cost of the hour.
No matter where you are in your journey, as a parent or a spouse, one session will change how you go forward.
%
More Money is spent on Adveserial Divorce compared to Mediation
The money spent on divorce is not yours or theirs, but your family’s. Both sides need to understand that the only ones who leave with more money than they started with, are the attorneys.
Services
Mediation
I will sit down with one or both of you and work to get you both everything you wish while ignoring the noise. I will inform you both of the ways the court is likely to rule if you were to contest it, and then leave the final decision to the two of you.
My goal is to keep the “fight” out of this, as much as possible. I understand and accept that you have already made the decision to split and my desire is to not fix the past, but give you both back control of the future. Ultimately, I want to make it easier for you, your spouse, and most importantly, your children.
Attorneys have a large financial incentive to push you towards a long and drawn-out divorce while using a playbook of less than ethical tactics. Your legal, emotional, and family interests are not necessarily aligned with theirs. I will consider all factors when working with you and your family and have no incentive to make our process any longer or harder than need be. I consider it a success if we can wrap it all up in as few sessions as possible.
Pre-marital Counseling
So, you have found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with? Congratulations! You may still have some questions or worries. Maybe you prefer to discuss these in private or with your soon-to-be spouse. Either way, I have an option for you.
Pre-marital consulting is a little different than marriage or relationship counseling. I only work to educate you on the nuances that you may not have thought about, and the potential legal ramifications. Not to dive into your personal life. Marriage is a big decision and comes with a contract, with terms, that you never actually get to read or sign. It may be the most important contract you’ll ever enter, and yet people do it, all the time, without counsel. Knowing what is ahead can help you make a more educated decision, and ultimately forge a more successful union.
Co-Parenting/Relationship Post Divorce
On top of helping people think about marriage and navigate through divorce, I work with parents who are having a hard time getting along after the marriage is over.
No one really talks about post-marital counseling, but it is so important and positive for moving forward. I am disappointed that more judges don’t order it as it clearly benefits the children greatly. However, if you were in the business of people arguing, why would you want to prevent it?
You may soon find, that you have more disagreements with your spouse after a divorce than you did while married. The idea that once you’re divorced, you are done is not the reality if you have children. My focus here is not to dissect your past, or find fault, but to focus on forward-moving solutions for the future.
Failure or Experience?
I know what you’re thinking when I’m asked… “Why would I seek counseling from a man who has divorced twice? ”
Catholic priests have been doing marital counseling (both pre, post, and during) for centuries and they have never had any wives.
My experiences with co-parenting, marriage, and divorce can only help you. I have juggled the financial and emotional hardships of divorce and have successfully co-parented for over 18 years. I even had the primary residence of my two older boys (now 22 and 19) and 50/50 with my youngest. (10)
I am aware of where I failed and also aware of what could have been prevented. I wish there was someone we could have turned to before starting a war that quickly was out of both of our control. I can teach you what I have learned through research, trial, and error, and protect you from legal vultures intending to get rich off of your family’s pain.
Who am I?
First and Foremost a Father
My life is dedicated to and about my 3 boys. Everything I do is for their benefit and well-being. When I went through a divorce, I saw the effect that it had on my children, and while, as parents, we did the best we could to shelter them, it was the lawyers and the legal system that made the whole process worse and harder than it ever needed to be. I may never forgive my own lawyer and judge for being involved in what can only be described as a sale of my children to me. The difference between having my children 50/50 and having them every other weekend boiled right down to cash. This was not the fault of my ex (as she was also given poor counsel) and solely the way the machine works in family court.
I was inspired by the lack of common sense and compassion shown to my family by the legal system, so I created a place where I could work with people in the same or similar position if only to keep them from making the same mistakes I have. If I can have a role in keeping your divorce peaceful and out of the hands of those with no other motive than to take your money, then I would consider that a success.
I have even worked to create a PAC to lobby state assemblymen to help fix the bias in the court and to make it fair for everyone regardless of gender! I have spoken with our senators and intend to continue to fight for fairness and children’s rights.
Helpful Articles and Links
On top of my blog, is “A Letter from a Divorce Attorney“. If you only read one article, let this one be the one.
Insight into the mind and the ultimate goal of the average divorce attorney is priceless in protecting your family.
Letter from a Divorce Attorney
The following letter is from an actual divorce attorney from Connecticut. I encourage you to read it and share it with your friends who have been divorced through the family court. They should be able to confirm what he is saying is true, and it should be...
Helpful/Interesting Links
https://nyscdm.memberclicks.net/ http://adr.findlaw.com/mediation/mediation-vs-arbitration-vs-litigation-whats-the-difference.html http://divorcedmoms.com/blogs/the-perils-of-divorced-pauline/6-ways-family-law-makes-a-bad-divorce-even-worse
Testimonials
“It’s never easy ending a marriage, but with Mike’s guidance my ex and I were able to spend a minimal amount of money. Go through mediation and not lawyers afforded us both the opportunity to agree on what worked for us and our family. I ended my almost 20-year marriage with a solid co-parenting agreement and both our assets intact. Mike’s knowledge proves that divorce doesn’t have to be long or costly, making starting a new life easier and less stressful!”
“I cannot express how much of a difference Michael made with my divorce. After one meeting I felt more confident and less stressed. I strongly recommend Michael to anyone who is even thinking about divorce. The stress he can save you is priceless.”
“I consulted Michael when my ex filed for sole custody of our sons. This was a very scary time for me and Michael was knowledgeable when it came to custody cases and assured me that this was a tactic and would not go to trial. Not only did it not go to trial, but our existing arrangement remained nearly intact due to existing custody arrangements holding a lot of weight and providing consistency for nearly 6 years for our sons. Michael has a lot of insight and wisdom. I highly recommend Michael!“
“I met Michael while going through a difficult custody battle. Michael has in depth knowledge of the Family Court proceedings, but more importantly he understands the toll this process takes on a person. Each session we worked on a plan to prepare the mind, body and emotions to endure the difficult and uncertain times. I would not hesitate to contact Michael in any situation where I needed someone strong to lean on”
FAQ
Q: What if I don’t agree with the mediation process? Is court still an option?
A: Yes. You always have the right to go back to court and stop mediation at any time. This is one of the best parts, in that you have nothing to lose by letting me try to save you money and time first!
Q: If we can come to an agreement, how long until we are officially divorced?
A: This depends mostly on the Judge’s ability to read, review, and sign your agreement. However, once agreed upon I can have it out of my office in 5 business days.
Q: Do you work with children?
A: I love children. However, I do not work directly with them. It is my position that they should be as blind as possible to the entire proceeding and the less they know about the details, the better.
Reach Us
All correspondence and contact information shared here, is kept confidential and is never saved, shared, or sold.
585-305-3935
michael@maritalconsultant.com